With one student in particular, it was a nightmare. Every day in one class, I would have to send this student out. He would play with his textbook, distract other students, make insensitive comments toward me, or he would find other ruthless ways and means to be anything but a productive student. I threw him out every day. I was stressful, only because like any other crazy schizophrenic teacher, I wanted to teach, but I did not want to be disrespected either. What a challenge to attempt accommodating both. After six weeks of this nonsense, I never had to deal with that class or that student again. Since the long-term assignment had ended, I was free to do anything else that I wanted. Of course, this student made a point of creating a lot of dissension and dissent throughout the district. When I took daily assignments at the continuation school, students began asking about previous conflicts with that student. I had nothing to say, I had learned to forgive, I had learned to let go, and I was not about to start the same nonsense that I had unjustly endured for six weeks prior. The following year, the same student in question had recently enrolled at the continuation school. I noticed the name, I was not interested in the least to see this student again, at first. Still, I could not just leave. There is no point to living in fear, since it cannot be dismissed outright. A lot of the students saw me on campus that day, who also knew about the previous problems that I had dealt with with that kid. One of the students sat by a computer in the classroom next to mine. When he saw me, he told met that the student was on campus.”Are you scared?” The kid asked with a weak and wicked grin.”Maybe,” I smiled back. Low and behold, the student whom I had tussled with for so long walked in the room, sat down at a computer next to the student who had tried to instigate something. Moved by the Holy Spirit, the Power greater than all things that moves us to do what is righteous, even when it seems like anything but right to our mind, lead me over to the kid. I waved at him, then I motioned for him to step outside. I told him right on the spot, “I’ve been looking forward to this day. I forgive you.”And I shook his hand, he went back to his seat, and that was that. I was no longer afraid because I was no longer holding back who I was. I did not project in my head what he would say or not say. Led by the Spirit, I spoke what came naturally. With a new spirit, I forgave the kid.
Am I scared? In my flesh I may tremble, but in my spirit I am unshakable. It’s a matter of faith, not sight or sense.