Why it is Hard to Forgive — Someone Has Already Paid: Part II

In the last post, I wrote about how unforgiveness, or a sense that our sins still need to be paid for, will prevent us from receive the grace and peace which comes from being told that the person whom we have harmed holds no grudges.

Even if someone tells us that what we have done led to good. Even if the person tells us over and over that God meant it for good, even then a sense of foreboding still weighs on us. A sense that what we have done still needs to be paid for — that one day, the blade will fall, cutting us.

This evil conscience need to be perfected, satisfied, completed, and we have this only through the Blood of Jesus Christ:

"Which was a figure for the time then present, in which were offered both
gifts and sacrifices, that could not make him that did the service perfect, as
pertaining to the conscience;" (Hebrews 9: 9)

then

"For then would they not have ceased to be offered? because that the worshippers
once purged should have had no more conscience of sins." (Hebrews 10: 2)

and finally

"For by one offering he hath perfected for ever them that are sanctified." (Hebrews 10: 14)

This pefection, or completion, speaks to the sense that we no longer owe God anything for our sins. By extension, we can receive peace and joy knowing that the wrongs done to us do not have to incite in us a sense of retaliation. In fact, the grace that forgives us is the same grace that we receive in greater measure in the face of persecutions, distresses, and other troubles in our lives. (2 Corinthians 12: 9-10)

Another account of unforgiveness, or bitterness, touches on
those who do not let go of a wrong that was done to them. Unlike Joseph’s
brothers, who refused to believe that Joseph had forgiven them fully, David the King remembered the wrong that he had suffered at the hand of Shimei the Benjaminite: (2 Samuel 16: 5-8):

"8And, behold, thou
hast with thee Shimei the son of Gera, a Benjamite of Bahurim, which cursed
me with a grievous curse in the day when I went to Mahanaim: but he came down to
meet me at Jordan, and I sware to him by the LORD, saying, I will not put thee
to death with the sword. 9Now therefore hold him
not guiltless: for thou art a wise man, and knowest what thou oughtest to
do unto him; but his hoar head bring thou down to the grave with blood." (1 Kings 2: 8-9)

Wow! Talk about a grudge! Yet at the time, when Shimei did curse him, this is what David had to say:

"10And the king said,
What have I to do with you, ye sons of Zeruiah? so let him curse, because the
LORD hath said unto him, Curse David. Who shall then say, Wherefore hast thou
done so? " (2 Samuel 16: 10)

Shimei's curses were empty, of course, because his ancestor Saul lost the Kingdom for his own sin. David did not take the Kingdom by force, but by grace did God give the Kingdom to David.

This proverb best fits for this circumstance:

"As the bird by wandering, as the swallow by flying, so the curse causeless shall
not come." (Proverbs 26: 2)

Shimei's curses were causeless, and they did not stop David at all. Yet the great Beloved King still remembered those curses. One must take into account, as well, that the above Proverb was likely written after David's death.

Still, the matter of David's bitterness remains. Imagine that! The great king, who sang about the Lord's victory working in his life through all the good that had been done through him. David had a heart after God, and God had his love set upon David.

Yet even for all the good that God had done for David, granting that the son next in line for the throne would come from the bowels of the very woman with whom he had committed adultery — now that's the grace of God! —  the same king who survived insurrection from one of his own sons, the same king who whithered through pestilence of taking a forbidden census, the same king who received revelation of the Messiah who would come, who would grant such grace that a man's sins would not be imputed to him – this same great king still held on to quite a grudge — against a disgruntled member of the House of Saul!

That's how powerful bitterness can be! David signalled to his son that the blood of this man had to be shed. Even though David's bitterness was with cause:

"You shall not revile God, nor curse the ruler of your people." (Exodus 22: 28)

Still, David felt compelled to tell his son to take him down, and after all those years!

Yet we have a greater consolation in Christ, a man who by His death takes away all our sins (Colossians 2: 13), but who more importantly became sin (2 Corinthians 5: 21) and became cursed for us as well:

"Christ hath redeemed us from the curse of the law, being made a curse for us:
for it is written, Cursed is every one that hangeth on a tree:" (Galatians 3:13)

Jesus' death exhausts our sin as well as the curse, or the consequences for the sin, too! Not only that, but God will remember our sins no more (Hebrews 8: 12).

Yet this peace comes at the highest price, through the death of Jesus Christ. We can receive this grace to give us peace not just for our sins, but also for the wrongs which others have done to us:

"For your shame ye shall have double; and for confusion they shall
rejoice in their portion: therefore in their land they shall possess the double:
everlasting joy shall be unto them." (Isaiah 61: 7)

David could not rest until blood was shed — we can rest, for the blood of our Beloved has been shed:

"And he is the
propitiation for our sins: and not for ours only, but also for the sins
of the whole world." (1 John 2: 2)

Jesus IS, right now, the mercy seat, the covering and wipe-out of all our sins, the blood that keeps on cleansing us from all unrighteousness!

Why it is hard to forgive — someone has paid for it already, yet for us to assume that we have to "do  something" makes no sense at all. Grow in grace and knowledge of the Lord, and watch Him pay for and more for all that you have done, that others have done, and He gets greater glory!