Another account of bitterness and unforgiveness cannot be overlooked: Jacob and Esau.
God had foretold to their mother Rebekah that the elder would serve the younger
"And the LORD said unto her, Two nations are in your womb, and two manner of
people shall be born of you; and the one people shall be stronger than the other
people; and the elder shall serve the younger." (Genesis 25: 23)
So, Jacob was supposed to get Father Issac's blessing, to begin with. Yet instead of trusting to make all things work out for him, Jacob followed mother Rebekah's advice, dressed up as Esau, then received the first-born birthright by treachery.
Esau was beside himself with rage:
"And Esau hated Jacob because of the blessing wherewith his father blessed him:
and Esau said in his heart, The days of mourning for my father are at hand; then
will I slay my brother Jacob.
"And these words of
Esau her elder son were told to Rebekah: and she sent and called Jacob her
younger son, and said unto him, Behold, thy brother Esau, as touching thee, doth
comfort himself, purposing to kill thee." (Genesis 27: 41-42)
Rebekah told Jacob when to return:
"Until thy brother's
anger turn away from thee, and he forget that which thou hast done to
him: then I will send, and fetch thee from thence: why should I be deprived also
of you both in one day?" (Genesis 27: 45)
The mother speaks of Esau's anger turning from Jacob, and that he would then forget what Jacob did.
Esau's anger did not go away, but instead he took out his anger on his parents:
"And Esau seeing that
the daughters of Canaan pleased not Isaac his father;
"Then went Esau unto
Ishmael, and took unto the wives which he had Mahalath the daughter of Ishmael
Abraham's son, the sister of Nebajoth, to be his wife." (Genesis 28: 8-9)
Jacob endured a number of setbacks and mishaps in his time with Uncle Laban, the brother of Rebekah, who changed Jacob's wages, then giving her his elder daughter before the beloved Rachel whom Jacob wanted.
After Jacob finally escaped from Laban, with his wives and children and livestock, yet when he saw his brother Esau coming toward him with four hundred men, he grew scared and begged God for help:
"9And Jacob said, O God
of my father Abraham, and God of my father Isaac, the LORD which saidst unto me,
Return unto thy country, and to thy kindred, and I will deal well with thee:
10I am not worthy of
the least of all the mercies, and of all the truth, which thou hast shewed unto
thy servant; for with my staff I passed over this Jordan; and now I am become
two bands. 11Deliver me, I pray
thee, from the hand of my brother, from the hand of Esau: for I fear him, lest
he will come and smite me, and the mother with the children. 12And thou saidst, I
will surely do thee good, and make thy seed as the sand of the sea, which cannot
be numbered for multitude." (Genesis 32: 9-12)
Jacob stopped grabbing and started asking. He asked Him directly for help, appealling to His Word, the Promise that He had made to Abraham and Isaac, the same blessing which he had also received!
Jacob received this grace, and in his meeting with Esau, he made it very clear:
"And he lifted up his eyes, and saw the women and the children; and said, Who
are those with thee? And he said, The children which God hath graciously
given thy servant." (Genesis 33: 5)
God "graciously" gave them — so Jacob made it very clear — that he did not get them because of anything that he had done.
Then Jacob shared:
"10And Jacob said,
Nay, I pray thee, if now I have found grace in thy sight, then receive my
present at my hand: for therefore I have seen thy face, as though I had seen the
face of God, and thou wast pleased with me. 11Take, I pray thee,
my blessing that is brought to thee; because God hath dealt graciously with me,
and because I have enough. And he urged him, and he took it." (Genesis 33: 10-11)
To assure that he had found grace in the sight of Esau — mercy, Jacob gave, urged Esau to receive all the good that he wanted his older brother to have.
This grace is lavishly given to us, as well, through Jesus! He lavishly forgives us all our sins, and then he wants us to receive even more from Him to certify to us that He has done great things for us!
Jesus has already paid for our sins, and what He has done is an overpayment, superabounding grace (Romans 5:15, 200 which we receive and release as we forgive.
I believe that because Jacob talked about the grace of God with Esau, that the peace that the older brother needed, he received! The more that we talk about God's grace in our lives, the more that we will receive peace, that the peace which Jesus leaves with us (John 14: 27) will not be troubled or effected, because we will not be pressed through our own efforts to hold onto hurts which He has paid for, or to fight for what He so freely gives!
Still, God richly blessed Jacob, yet only after he wrestled with God in the night (Genesis 32: 24-32) did Jacob find himself effectively humbled.
In Genesis 33